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The Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > FYAD Goldmine > The Matrix would have been better if it was about making pizza (From FYAD) (2): 1 2  
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Gegtik
Joined: Sep 30, 2002


I used to think Firstblud was a less successful clone of dans1120 but I was mistaken. sorry firstblud. rated dead ninjababies

also this thread needs sticky

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May 11, 2003: 11:22
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Sanschel
Joined: Aug 09, 2002


quote:
Gegtik wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
I used to think Firstblud was a less successful clone of dans1120 but I was mistaken. sorry firstblud. rated dead ninjababies

also this thread needs sticky



firstblud was here before dans1120

when eloH is done with the script, we should film it

May 11, 2003: 11:29
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Gegtik
Joined: Sep 30, 2002


quote:
Sanschel wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":


firstblud was here before dans1120

when eloH is done with the script, we should film it



It was the whole wing commander thing, also I only started posting here in january so i don't know much

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May 11, 2003: 11:36
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Sanschel
Joined: Aug 09, 2002


quote:
Gegtik wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":


It was the whole wing commander thing, also I only started posting here in january so i don't know much

you mean in fyad?

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May 11, 2003: 11:38
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Justor
Joined: Aug 11, 2002


the matrix

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May 11, 2003: 11:39
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Hey!
Joined: Feb 26, 2001


MORE MONEY = BETTER THAN

oh man, that is a LOT of lollin'

May 11, 2003: 11:44
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Sasquatch!
Joined: Nov 18, 2000


quote:
lenin wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":


fuck the contrasts got ruined somehow


Holy fuck...laughing too hard...can't breathe.

May 11, 2003: 11:56
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l33t b4c0n
Joined: Aug 19, 2000


King of E/N

But how can you eat a slice, Mr. Anderson, when you have no mouth?

May 11, 2003: 11:56
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DanSTC
Joined: Aug 05, 2002


I believe that almost ANY movie would be a thousand times better if it were about making pizza.

Because just about anything involving making pizza is instantly better.

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May 11, 2003: 12:16
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GravitonMan!
Joined: Jun 08, 2002


Baby, this is gonna hurt me more than it hurts you.

Im going to enjoy watching you bake mr. anderson

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May 11, 2003: 12:43
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Crazy685
Joined: Jun 17, 2002


Police: They're in the walls. They're in the walls!
Cypher: It's a delivery boy!
Trinity: Morpheus!
Morpheus: You must get it delivered. 30 minutes or less or its free!
Neo: No. No, Morpheus! Don't!
Morpheus: Trinity, go! They will get the Pepsi complimentary if you fail!
Trinity: Go!
Neo: We can't leave him! He has the address!
Trinity: You have to!.... Cypher, come on!

May 11, 2003: 12:44
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AmasiMilk
Joined: Feb 01, 2003


Sticky?

May 11, 2003: 12:48
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[=TrAsH=]
Joined: Jun 11, 2002


quote:
LunixKing wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
It's a single topping pizza combined with garlic squares, poppers, and a small cola. Everything the body needs.


HA! 5!

May 11, 2003: 12:57
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[=TrAsH=]
Joined: Jun 11, 2002


quote:
AmasiMilk wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
Sticky?


Yeah, make it stay on page one of the forum, at the top. Sticky.

You know, in Australia recently, there actually WAS a movie about a pizza store, it was a comedy, that was an extension of a tv show in Australia. Very funny shit.

But this thread is marvellous. I am going to start on that script now.

May 11, 2003: 13:21
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TyrantTif
Joined: Sep 30, 2002



Follow the white delivery car.

I can only show you the menu, You have to order.

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May 11, 2003: 13:41
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Publikwerks
Joined: Aug 13, 2002



Trinity: Neo, I'm not afraid anymore. The Oracle told me that I would order a pizza, and that that delivery man would be The One. So you see, you can't be dead. You can't be, because I 'm hungry. You hear me? I 'm hungry.... Now get up.

May 11, 2003: 13:48
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Chief Bossguy
Joined: Mar 26, 2001


i wish you could vote cramps more than once

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May 11, 2003: 13:52
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dvlzomb
Joined: Feb 09, 2003


i gave

May 11, 2003: 13:53
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I Am Ditka
Joined: Jul 13, 2002


It is the sauce that drives us mad. The marinara is out there Neo; it will find you if you want it to.





P.s. best thread in a while

May 11, 2003: 13:55
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Reverend Sam
Joined: May 08, 2002


But there are way too many orders to deliver The Pizzas. You get used to it. I-I don't even see the orders. All I see is pepperoni, extra cheese, onions....

May 11, 2003: 14:15
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Pidge
Joined: Feb 27, 2003


hay guys

This thread does two things

1. Makes me hungry

2. Makes me laugh

Combined with food, I love this thread

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May 11, 2003: 14:32
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quietmonkey
Joined: Nov 23, 2002


which will he pick, mushroom or pepperoni?

May 11, 2003: 14:44
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OMGWTFBBQ
Joined: Nov 17, 2000


Forums Witchdoctor

Gaybee is the worst IK ever. Stuck.

May 11, 2003: 14:48
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ShadowDRat
Joined: Feb 04, 2003


this thread is one of the many more reasons why FYAD is superior

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May 11, 2003: 14:55
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OMGWTFBBQ
Joined: Nov 17, 2000


Forums Witchdoctor

ATTENTION: I want to use this for not this weeks, but the next weeks Comedy Goldmine. PLEASE go back and redo the images if you could, and make new ones as well. I really really want to use this thread.

May 11, 2003: 14:56
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Hellsoap
Joined: Sep 06, 2002



quote:
OMGWTFBBQ wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
ATTENTION: I want to use this for not this weeks, but the next weeks Comedy Goldmine. PLEASE go back and redo the images if you could, and make new ones as well. I <i>really</i> really want to use this thread.




hey can you please unsticky that closed stuck thread and that penis one thanx

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May 11, 2003: 14:59
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FirstBlud
Joined: Aug 05, 2001


Freespace LOL

quote:
OMGWTFBBQ wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
ATTENTION: I want to use this for not this weeks, but the next weeks Comedy Goldmine. PLEASE go back and redo the images if you could, and make new ones as well. I <i>really</i> really want to use this thread.


are my images ok?

May 11, 2003: 15:03
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Mako
Joined: Apr 22, 2001



What exactly do you mean by redo? Add the somethingawful tag? recompress?

May 11, 2003: 15:06
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OMGWTFBBQ
Joined: Nov 17, 2000


Forums Witchdoctor

quote:
Mako wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
What exactly do you mean by redo? Add the somethingawful tag? recompress?


Make them photo realistic like in photoshop. I know it's asking a lot, but I just love the idea so very much. If you guys don't want to, that's okay too.

May 11, 2003: 15:14
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dvlzomb
Joined: Feb 09, 2003


quote:
Mako wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
What exactly do you mean by redo? Add the somethingawful tag? recompress?

make them look half decent

edit : placeholdr

dvlzomb fucked around with this message at May 11, 2003 around 15:32

May 11, 2003: 15:16
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Tato
Joined: Jun 19, 2001


I think the cartoony moustaches and chef hats are half of the fun though. I don't have the skill to make any of mine look realistic, although I'm sure some body does.

Tato fucked around with this message at May 11, 2003 around 15:22

May 11, 2003: 15:19
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AznGamer
Joined: Nov 30, 2001


:5bux: and my custom title comes back.

Hahahaha. This is one of the great FYAD goldmine.

May 11, 2003: 15:27
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Hellsoap
Joined: Sep 06, 2002



in late with some paint

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May 11, 2003: 15:28
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Wrathraven
Joined: May 20, 2002


Bulbasaur, TACKLE ATTACK!

quote:
Tato wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
I think the cartoony moustaches and chef hats are half of the fun though. I don't have the skill to make any of mine look realistic, although I'm sure some body does.

don't change a thing

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May 11, 2003: 15:29
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Jolt
Joined: Dec 29, 2001


redo them

i purposley aliased the text and made the hats and moustaches look as shitty as possible...

i guess i can redo them if blud gives me the source images.

but I think the moustaches and hats have to stay ms paint style for full effect.

May 11, 2003: 15:30
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OMGWTFBBQ
Joined: Nov 17, 2000


Forums Witchdoctor

quote:
Tato wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
I think the cartoony moustaches and chef hats are half of the fun though. I don't have the skill to make any of mine look realistic, although I'm sure some body does.


You're right. It'll be a goldmine, but I probably won't be able to use it for the front page.

Damn the standards!

May 11, 2003: 15:30
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FirstBlud
Joined: Aug 05, 2001


Freespace LOL

quote:
Tato wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
I think the cartoony moustaches and chef hats are half of the fun though. I don't have the skill to make any of mine look realistic, although I'm sure some body does.


It's definetely funnier in Paint. This isn't exactly a photoshop thread either.

May 11, 2003: 15:38
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Sasquatch!
Joined: Nov 18, 2000


quote:
Tato wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
I think the cartoony moustaches and chef hats are half of the fun though. I don't have the skill to make any of mine look realistic, although I'm sure some body does.

I agree. I also think that the pictures on their own - without the text misquote posts - wouldn't hold up as well. This thread is a work of art as a whole; I don't think that you could just grab the photoshops out of it and still have it work.

Just my $0.02 CDN though.

May 11, 2003: 15:40
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Tato
Joined: Jun 19, 2001


I'm not sure if you can tell that he's holding a rolling pin or not.

May 11, 2003: 15:46
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dvlzomb
Joined: Feb 09, 2003


quote:
OMGWTFBBQ wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":


You're right. It'll be a goldmine, but I probably won't be able to use it for the front page.

Damn the standards!


sucks

May 11, 2003: 15:48
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Crazy685
Joined: Jun 17, 2002


Whoa.. Dejavue... I just delivered a pizza to this address last night...

What, neo?

I said De Ja Vue...This address... I was here last night..

There are no De Ja Vues, Neo.. there must be a glitch in the programming.

No, Trinity, the people who live here are fat.

Oh, okay, nevermind then.

May 11, 2003: 15:55
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Maka
Joined: Mar 18, 2001


I don't think I've ever laughed this hard in fyad.

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May 11, 2003: 15:58
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FirstBlud
Joined: Aug 05, 2001


Freespace LOL

I think it would be nice to have an FYAD goldmine featured on the front page for once.

I know this sounds a bit GBS, but I'd like to thank everyone who contributed to this thread. You guys are a million times funnier than I am.

May 11, 2003: 15:59
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Pidge
Joined: Feb 27, 2003


hay guys



oh wai

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May 11, 2003: 16:00
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OMGWTFBBQ
Joined: Nov 17, 2000


Forums Witchdoctor

quote:
Sasquatch! wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":

I agree. I also think that the pictures on their own - without the text misquote posts - wouldn't hold up as well. This thread is a work of art as a whole; I don't think that you could just grab the photoshops out of it and still have it work.

Just my $0.02 CDN though.



Better than I could have put it.

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May 11, 2003: 16:05
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wing
Joined: Apr 25, 2003


rude boy army

This is the best thread in the history of threads.

May 11, 2003: 16:09
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Maka
Joined: Mar 18, 2001


quote:
wing wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
This is the best thread in the history of threads.

May 11, 2003: 16:13
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Publikwerks
Joined: Aug 13, 2002



May 11, 2003: 16:27
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Reaten
Joined: Jun 29, 2002

wtf is a custom title

quote:
wing wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
This is the best thread in the history of threads.

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May 11, 2003: 16:28
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prowler_16
Joined: Mar 10, 2003


Tank: The manager of every pizzeria is given the ingredients to our secret pizza sauce. If an employee of a major franchise got the recipe, it could put us out of business. We can't let that happen.

May 11, 2003: 16:30
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vots
Joined: Jul 11, 2002


"This party's over!"

Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pizza Place would have been better if it was about the Matrix.

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May 11, 2003: 16:39
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Publikwerks
Joined: Aug 13, 2002



Mr. Rhineheart: You have a problem with authority, Mr. Anderson. You believe that you are special, that somehow the rules do not apply to you. Obviously you are mistaken. This Restaurant is one of the top pizzerias in the world because every single employee understands that they are part of a pie. Thus if an employee has a problem, the pizzeria has a problem. The time has come to make a choice, Mr. Anderson. Either you choose to be at your oven on time from this day forward or you choose to find yourself another job. Do I make myself clear?

Neo: Yes, Mr. Rhineheart, perfectly clear.

May 11, 2003: 16:42
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Chief Rebel Angel
Joined: Apr 09, 2003


aka Lucifer

In before Goldmine. At least officially, anyway.

This thread is so awesome. It proves why FYAD is the best forum here.

May 11, 2003: 16:47
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buckwheaton
Joined: Dec 03, 2002

internet vs. robots

tank: pizza hut.
trinity: tank! I need a driver.

May 11, 2003: 16:54
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eXXon
Joined: Aug 19, 2002


I don't have time to bleed!

May 11, 2003: 17:00
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nogic
Joined: Jul 06, 2002


quote:
eXXon wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":

lol

bump

edit: wait fuck

May 11, 2003: 17:05
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Tato
Joined: Jun 19, 2001


I can't wait until the sequel comes out.

May 11, 2003: 17:10
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FaceEater
Joined: Aug 14, 2002


TheFraggot

Why oh why didn't I take the black olives?

May 11, 2003: 17:14
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Pidge
Joined: Feb 27, 2003


hay guys

quote:
eXXon wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":



ROOFLES TOOFLES

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May 11, 2003: 17:24
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lenin
Joined: Sep 11, 2001


Forums Witchdoctor

I am so fucking going to make more animated .gifs once crappyhosting is back

May 11, 2003: 17:36
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jayzlie
Joined: Nov 05, 2002


Needs more tails

needs more pepperoni

May 11, 2003: 17:38
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lenin
Joined: Sep 11, 2001


Forums Witchdoctor

lenin fucked around with this message at May 11, 2003 around 18:49

May 11, 2003: 17:53
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Laopooh
Joined: Jul 15, 2000


Neo: Pizza.

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-><-

May 11, 2003: 17:54
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OMGWTFBBQ
Joined: Nov 17, 2000


Forums Witchdoctor

quote:
lenin wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
okay, OMGWTFBBQ, please perhaps you can answer this

why does optimizing a .gif in imageready make all the colers duller? Is there a way to save it without doing that?



the pizza is supposed to be brown, yellow and red but now it's just gray



It's the amount of colors. 64 and up are okay usually. Anything lower and you lose the correct colors, and the file size goes down.

May 11, 2003: 17:57
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lenin
Joined: Sep 11, 2001


Forums Witchdoctor

How do I change the number of colors?

May 11, 2003: 18:09
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Mako
Joined: Apr 22, 2001



quote:
lenin wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
How do I change the number of colors?


Window > Optimize

under the optimize window that pops up click the 'Optimize tab'

there will be a field that says 'Colors:' and has a value in it.. you can change it there.

May 11, 2003: 18:15
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lenin
Joined: Sep 11, 2001


Forums Witchdoctor

Thanks d00d, all fixed

May 11, 2003: 18:18
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Avatar
Joined: Jan 23, 2002


Avatar decided to show you this image:

Avatar fucked around with this message at May 11, 2003 around 18:55

May 11, 2003: 18:33
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lenin
Joined: Sep 11, 2001


Forums Witchdoctor

Eat this

May 11, 2003: 18:48
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DanSTC
Joined: Aug 05, 2002


This thread makes me feel good. (And hungry.)

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May 11, 2003: 18:55
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Thock
Joined: Apr 13, 2003

C'mon four billion! Fuck. Seven. I need some more dice.

quote:
lenin wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":



hahahahahahahahahahahahaahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahah


best image in the history of the anything

May 11, 2003: 19:02
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Commie262
Joined: Feb 19, 2003


God Don't Like Ugly, So He Hates Me

Edit: I am colosally retarted and am not worthy to post in this thread.

Commie262 fucked around with this message at May 11, 2003 around 21:00

May 11, 2003: 19:06
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eloH
Joined: Apr 16, 2002


Written by eloH and FYAD



(Cellular)
Cypher: Yeah.
Trinity: Is everything in place?
Cypher: You weren't supposed to relieve me.
Trinity: I know, but I felt like taking your shift.
Cypher: You like his pizza, don't you? You like watching him cook.
Trinity: Don't be ridiculous.

Cypher: We're going to put him out of business, do you understand that?
Trinity: Morpheus believes he is Papa John.
Cypher: Do you?
Trinity: It doesn't matter what I believe.
Cypher: You don't, do you?
Trinity: Did you smell that?
Cypher: Smell what?
Trinity: Are you sure this oven is clean?
Cypher: Yeah, 'course I'm sure.
Trinity: I better go.

(Hotel room)
Cop: Hey, It's the pizza guys. Hand us our money. Do it. Do it now.

(Street)
Agent Smith: Mario...
Mario: Oh shit.
Agent Smith: Mario, you were given specific orders.
Mario: Hey, I'm just doing my job. You give me that '30 minutes or less' crap, you can cram it up your ass.
Agent Smith: The orders were for your protection.
Mario: I think we can handle one personal pan.... I sent two delivery men. They're bringing her the pizza now.
Agent Smith: No Mario, your men are already dead.

(Hotel room)
Trinity: Morpheus, the Pizza was traced, I don't know how.
Morpheus: I know, they cut the sauce line. There's no time, you're going to have to get to another pizzeria.
Trinity: Are there any managers?
Morpheus: Yes.
Trinity: Goddammit.
Morpheus: You have to focus, Trinity. There's a domino's at Wells and Lake. You can make it.
Trinity: All right.
Morpheus: Go.

(Rooftop)
Cop: That's impossible.

(Building)
Trinity: Eat up Trinity. Just eat up. Eat up.

(Street)
Agent Brown: She got her pizza.
Agent Smith: It doesn't matter.
Agent Jones: The burnt crust is real.
Agent Smith: Yes.
Agent Jones: We have the name of their next delivery boy.
Agent Brown: The name is Neo.
Agent Smith: We'll need a search running.
Agent Jones: It's already begun.

(Neo's apartment)
Neo: What? What the hell?... Use the white cheese?... Who is it?
Choi: It's Choi.
Neo: Yeah. Yeah. You're two hours late.
Choi: I know, it's her fault.
Neo: You got the money?
Choi: Eleven bucks.
Neo: Hold on.
Choi: Hallelujah. You're my savior, man. My own personal Little Caesar.
Neo: You get caught eating that...
Choi: Yeah, I know. This was never baked. These toppings don't exist.
Neo: Right.
Choi: Something wrong, man? You look a little greasier than usual.
Neo: My oven, it... You ever have that feeling where you're not sure if you're awake or still dreaming?
Choi: Mm, all the time. It's called New York style. It's the only way to fly. Hey, it just sounds to me like you need
to take off your apron, man. You know, get some R and R. What do you think, Maria? Should we take him with us?
Maria: Definitely.
Neo: No, I can't, I got work tomorrow.
Maria: Come on, It'll be fun. I promise.
Neo: Yeah, sure, I'll go.

(Club)
Trinity: Hello Neo.
Neo: How do you know that name?
Trinity: I know a lot about you.
Neo: Who are you?
Trinity: My name is Trinity.
Neo: Trinity. The Trinity? The one that cooked a calzone for the president?
Trinity: That was a long time ago.
Neo: Jesus.
Trinity: What?
Neo: I just thought, um...you were a guy.
Trinity: Most guys do.
Neo: That was you in my oven. How did you do that?
Trinity: Right now all I can tell you is that you're in danger. I brought you here to warn you.
Neo: Of what?
Trinity: They're watching you, Neo.
Neo: Who is?
Trinity: Please just listen. I know why you're here, Neo. I know what you've been doing. I know why you hardly
sleep, why you live alone, and why night after night you sit at your oven. You're looking for it. I know,
because I was once looking for the same thing. And when I found it, it told me I wasn't really looking for it.
I was looking for an answer. It's the question that drives us, Neo. It's the question that brought you here. You
know the question just as I did.
Neo: What is the Perfect Crust?
Trinity: The answer is out there, Neo. It's looking for you. And it will find you, if you want it to.

(Neo's apartment)
Neo: Oh shit. Oh shit shit shit. Mama mia.

__________________

Fyad rulz

May 11, 2003: 19:13
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Priest Holmes
Joined: Aug 10, 2002


Four Touchdowns - Never Forget

This thread would have been better if it ended after page one.

__________________
Posting stoned.

May 11, 2003: 19:22
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verix
Joined: Jul 03, 2002


WHERE'S MY BREAKFAST?!!?

quote:
eloH wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
Written by eloH and FYAD


oh man oh man oh man oh man


ARE THERE ANY FYADERS HERE WITH HOOKUPS IN HOLLYWOOD?!

quote:
Priest Holmes wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
This thread would have been better if it ended after page one.


HEATHEN

May 11, 2003: 19:22
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titaniumone
Joined: Jun 09, 2001

TOUCHDOWN FOR DEMOCRACY!

quote:
Priest Holmes wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
This thread would have been better if it ended after page one.


gay

May 11, 2003: 19:29
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toolboi
Joined: Jul 24, 2002

I HAVE MICHAEL MOORE'S FAT, GREASY COCK WEDGED IN MY MOUTH.



oh, and I kinda fixed up this one:
http://www.lowta.cx/upload/thematrixreloadeda.jpg

__________________

May 11, 2003: 19:32
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lenin
Joined: Sep 11, 2001


Forums Witchdoctor

quote:
Priest Holmes wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
This thread would have been better if it ended after page one.


I don't know who you are but I can safely assume that you are a faggot

May 11, 2003: 19:34
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eloH
Joined: Apr 16, 2002


(Office)
Julianno DiGeorgio: You have a problem with authority, Mr. Giovanni. You believe that you are special, that somehow
the rules do not apply to you. Obviously you are mistaken. This pizzeria is one of the top italian restaurants in
the world because every single chef understands that they are part of a whole. Thus if a chef has a
problem, the company has a problem. The time has come to make a choice, Mr. Giovanni. Either you choose to be at
your oven on time from this day forward or you choose to find yourself another job. Do I make myself clear?
Neo: Yes, Mr. DiGeorgio, perfectly clear.

FedEx Man: Paulino Giovanni?
Neo: Yeah, that's me.
FedEx Man: Just sign here.. Ok, great. Have a nice day.
Neo: Hello.
Morpheus: Hello Neo. Do you know who this is?
Neo: Morpheus.
Morpheus: Yes. I've been looking for you, Neo. I don't know if you're ready to eat what I want you to, but
unfortunately you and I have run out of time. They're coming for you, Neo, and I don't know what they're going to
do.
Neo: Who's coming for me?
Morpheus: Stand up and see for yourself.
Neo: What, right now?
Morpheus: Yes, now. Do it slowly. The front door.
Neo: Mama mia.
Morpheus: Yes.
Neo: What the hell do they want from me?
Morpheus: I don't know, but if you don't want to find out I suggest you get out of there.
Neo: How?
Morpheus: I can guide you but you must do exactly as I say.
Neo: Ok.
Morpheus: The oven across from you is empty.
Neo: What if they...
Morpheus: Go, now... Stay in front of it for just a moment. When I tell you, go to the end of the row, to the restroom at the
end of the hall. Stay as low as you can... Go, now... Good. Now, outside there is a ladder.
Neo: How do you know all this?
Morpheus: We don't have time, Neo. To your left there's a window. Go to it... Open it. You can use the ladder
to get to the roof.
Neo: Nessun senso. Nessun senso. This is crazy.
Morpheus: There are two ways out of this building. One is that ladder, the other is in their delivery van. You take
a chance either way. I leave it to you.
Neo: This is insane. Why is this happening to me? What did I do? I'm nobody.... Mama mia.... I can't do this.

(Street)
Trinity: Shit.

(Interrogation)
Agent Smith: As you can see, we've had our eye on you for some time now, Mr. Giovanni. It seems that you've been
living two lives. In one life, you're Paulino F. Giovanni, pizza chef for a respectable italian restaurant, you
have a social security number, you pay your taxes, and you help your landlady cook pizzas for dinner. The other
life is lived in front of ovens, where you go by the chef alias Neo and are guilty of virtually every food crime
we have a law for. One of these lives has a future, and one of them does not. I'm going to be as forthcoming as I
can be, Mr. Giovanni. You're here because we need your help. We know that you've been contacted by a certain
individual, a man who calls himself Morpheus. Now whatever you think you know about this man is irrelevant. He is
considered by many authorities to be the most skilled chef alive. My colleagues believe that I am wasting my
time with you but I believe that you wish to do the right thing. We're willing to wipe the oven clean, give you
a fresh slice and all that we're asking in return is your cooperation in bringing a known terrorist to justice.
Neo: Yeah. Wow, that sounds like a really good deal. But I think I got a better one. How about I give you six
bucks... and you give me the whole pie.
Agent Smith: Um, Mr. Giovanni. You disappoint me.
Neo: You can't scare me with this Polizia crap. I know my rights. I want my pie.
Agent Smith: And tell me, Mr. Giovanni, what good is a pizza pie if you're unable to eat?... You're going to
help us, Mr. Giovanni, whether you want to or not.

(Neo's apartment)
Morpheus: This line is tapped, so I must be brief. They got to you first, but they've underestimated how
important you are. If they knew what I know, you'd probably be full.
Neo: What are you talking about. What... what is happening to my pizza?
Morpheus: You are Papa John, Neo. You see, you may have spent the last few years looking for my pizza, but I've spent my
entire life looking for yours. Now do you still want to meet?
Neo: Yes.
Morpheus: Then go to the Adams street Bridge.

(Car)
Trinity: Get in.

Neo: What the hell is this?
Trinity: It's necessary, Neo. For our protection.
Neo: From what.
Trinity: From your toppings.
Switch: Take off your apron.
Neo: What?
Switch: Stop the car. Listen to me, pepperoncini. We don't have time for twenty questions. Right now there's only
one rule, our way or the highway.
Neo: Fine.
Trinity: Please, Neo. You have to trust me.
Neo: Why?
Trinity: Because you have been down there, Neo. You know that road. You know exactly where it ends. And I know
that's not where you want to deliver to... Apoc, lights. Lie back, lift up your apron.
Neo: What is that thing?
Trinity: We think you've been given some bad pepperoni... Try and relax... Come on. Come on.
Switch: It's on the move.
Trinity: Shit.
Switch: You're going to lose it.
Trinity: No I'm not. Clear.
Neo: Mama Mia! That thing's real?

__________________

Fyad rulz

May 11, 2003: 19:40
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lenin
Joined: Sep 11, 2001


Forums Witchdoctor

LOLLERCAUST

May 11, 2003: 19:45
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Huge_Midget
Joined: Jun 06, 2002


Head of FYaD Research & Development

Comedy cramps!

May 11, 2003: 19:50
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FirstBlud
Joined: Aug 05, 2001


Freespace LOL

quote:
eloH wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":



whoa

FirstBlud fucked around with this message at May 12, 2003 around 19:27

May 11, 2003: 19:52
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SGTGAFSNA
Joined: May 19, 2001

Scones? You dare ask for scones?

I love this thread more than I love pizza, and I'm a man that loves his pizza.

SGTGAFSNA fucked around with this message at May 13, 2003 around 22:11

May 11, 2003: 19:57
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l33t b4c0n
Joined: Aug 19, 2000


King of E/N

OMGWTFBBQ, I think this can still be put up as a frontpage goldmine. I think it needs to be shared. Something like this is too funny to be kept in the forums.

May 11, 2003: 20:00
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Tato
Joined: Jun 19, 2001


FirstBlud should be commended for creating this thread. Hopefully the same can be done for The Matrix Reloaded.

May 11, 2003: 20:02
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Mighty Germ
Joined: Jun 29, 2002


quote:
Tato wrote this in a previous episode of "FYAD: THE SERIES":
FirstBlud should be commended for creating this thread. Hopefully the same can be done for The Matrix Reheated.

fixd

May 11, 2003: 20:17
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