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The Awful Forums > General > General Bullshit > Children's Drawings of the WTC Attacks
 
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Livestock
Registered: 01-01

TOUCHDOWN FOR DEMOCRACY!

Earlier this week, I did an update critiquing poor children who attempted to draw pictures on the subject of divorce. Obviously children are incapable of possessing talent, so their pictures ended up looking awful. What you don't know is that I had originally thought about doing a critique of something even less funny. By "less funny" I mean less tasteful. Yes, making fun of the poor children of divorce wasn't low enough for me. Of course my idea would never be acceptable on the front page, so I am now bringing it here, where standards are left at the door!

My target was going to be the FEMA for Kids site. For those of you who aren't American (and you know who you are!), FEMA is America's Federal Emergency Management Agency. That basically means they are the agency in charge of our nation's vast array of tornado warning sirens. Their website happens to feature a gallery of drawings by dastardly children responding to the even more dastardly September 11th terrorist attacks.

Quite frankly, these drawings were both poorly made and downright scary. I've taken the time to give you my take on a few of the drawings. Yes, I know this is cruel and unsavory, but I'm a cruel and unsavory character. I'm like Lex Luther, only I'm poor and I drive a Ford Tempo.

FEMA for Kids – WTC Attack Gallery
Image #1


This picture presents a chilling alternate theory to the September 11th attacks. You will clearly notice that the first tower seems to be exploding prior to the actual impact with the plane! This means that there could easily have been a bomb placed in either one or both of the towers. Let's take a closer look at this scene just to make sure:

Obviously, the explosion occurred prior to the impact. Did the terrorist hijackers aboard the plane know about the explosives planted in the building? Or is this one horrifying coincidence?


The artist also chose to include a fairy phoenix rising above the towers, perhaps affirming his belief that a higher power somehow ordained this. Clearly, the creator of this horrible image is truly disturbed in his political beliefs and ideals.


At the base of the towers stand six individuals serving as witnesses to the absolute carnage. Who are these chilling observers and why do they seem so calm? They watch on in relative peace, almost as if they welcome the tragedy. Again, another subtle addation that affirms the artist's sick beliefs.

Image #2

This picture borders on being a surrealist interpretation of the tragedy. The overall pandemonium depicted seems almost apocalyptic in nature. This scene could easily have been lifted straight from the Bible.

Here we see two giants climbing the mighty towers. What's interesting is that they need not even grasp the building, but instead seem to cling to the sides with little surface contact. They seem unconcerned, as they wave to the crowd. Another possibility is that they are giving the infamous Nazi salute, but that's just speculation. It should be noted that both of these individuals are scaling the building prior to the actual impact with the planes. In fact, much of this chaos is occurring as the first plane strikes.


The plane, which seems to be symbolized by the male member, or perhaps a link of sausage, has the word "Hi" written on the front of the plane. You can see what looks to be "jac" written on the very end of the plane. This seems to indicate that the plane is "hijaced" by terrorists. But when would the terrorist have had time to add these markings to the plane? Wouldn't it have been more practical to leave them off, as to blend in with regular air traffic? Clearly, the terrorist weren't quite as clever as we give them credit for. In the rear window of the plane, you can see a human being with "X's" for eyes. This either suggests that the person is dead, or that there is a bit of numerology involved. X is equivalent to ten in Roman numerals, placing the value of 20 on this person's face. What could this mean? It means I need to change my pants, because that's some scary shit.


The final and most chilling component of this image is this scene in which two children dance around a prophet-like character standing in the streets. As you can clearly see, the purple-clad prophet has three eyes! Obviously this prophet is seeing opportunity through her third eye. The children celebrate this evil false prophet with glee, as the world falls apart around them! Indeed, a harrowing look at end times.

Let this show all of you, children are some messed up people!

__________________

I am the owner of a Huge Midget and a Mr. SmartyMan. Kids are hard to keep track of!

04-12 18:37
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Aussie_Jim
Registered: 07-01


Livestock wins again

love the first one

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04-12 18:41
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Skrewloose
Registered: 02-02


TICK TOCK

Well one thing's for sure. Those kids will never. EVER. be aerospace engineers.

Flying submarines indeed.

04-12 18:43
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Sock
Registered: 10-01

Do me. Do me.

Lets not forget the FEMA rap!

http://www.fema.gov/kids/femarap.htm

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04-12 18:45
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Kyle EYV
Registered: 10-01

John Dillinger is my motherfucking idol.

This critique was very informative, even more ammo for the case of why small children shouldn't be given crayons. Their hands are tiny, aren't they capable of intricate stitching? Schools are always complaining about the lack of money to go around. Now if they would hook themselves up with a business like Tommy Hilfiger or Nike, they could convert the classroom to a sweatshop facility, reaping in the profits from having these children slave the day away making the garmets their parents would in turn buy them. It's a vicous cycle of school funding, and I'm for it!

04-12 18:45
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Dr. Lecter
Registered: 09-01


I busted a gut laughing ... quality material.

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04-12 18:45
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Palpy
Registered: 06-00

Forum Veteran

quote:
Sock came out of the closet to say:
Lets not forget the FEMA rap!

http://www.fema.gov/kids/femarap.htm



This can only be the sinsister work of Walton Simons.

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04-12 18:49
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jake1357
Registered: 07-01


Funny stuff. But, I must say the front page article was better. Just the idea of concentrating on explaining how bad at drawing 5 year olds are is funny.

I was really impressed at the comedy value of that update, BTW.

04-12 18:55
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NC
Registered: 07-01


The second picture does appear to demonstrate psychosis of seismic proportions. "CDA!!!!!!!!!!!"

04-12 18:59
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Kobewest
Registered: 03-02


DAS FUHRER!

You gave me a great laugh. Thank you Livestock. Please do more analysis of these captivating drawings.

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04-12 19:00
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titaniumone
Registered: 06-01


quote:
Livestock came out of the closet to say:
This either suggests that the person is dead, or that there is a bit of numerology involved. X is equivalent to ten in Roman numerals, placing the value of 20 on this person's face. What could this mean? It means I need to change my pants, because that's some scary shit.



5. Fucking hilarious. I <3 you more every day, Livestock.

04-12 19:01
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Dr. Gordon Freeman
Registered: 02-02

Superbus Via Inscientiæ

Thanks, this is brilliant.

04-12 19:06
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microsoftninja
Registered: 03-02


I was walking through the mall a couple of months ago when I happened upon some drawings similar to these of the WTC center disaster set up in a store window. One of them depicted a fireman on a ladder that scaled the entire height of the first tower, with a fireman at the top putting out the fire. My instant reaction to this was to burst out laughing. Apparently other passer byers in the mall in fact didn't find the proportional inaccuracy of the young man's drawing hillarious.

04-12 19:08
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Nimrod "Felcher" Soames
Registered: 02-01

Excretus Est Ex Altitudine

Wow. That's amazing.
These kids obviouisly know something we don't.
Such as new designs for planes that will fly around in circles (see wing position of picture 2) and VTOL birds.
WELCOME TO THE FUTURE, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.

EDIT - I love the

code:
H JA I C

...on the blue plane.
It's like the terrorists have mastered Red Alert 2 mind control tehniques....

Nimrod "Felcher" Soames fucked around with this message at 04-12 around 19:15

04-12 19:12
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Crusty_mabiba
Registered: 03-01

I dance for the Japanese men.

That was hilarious. great job.

04-12 19:14
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245-Trioxin
Registered: 07-01

Mr.Whitefolks

I wish there was a six for "special" occasions.

Bravo.

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04-12 19:15
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Khrushchev
Registered: 03-02


My only redeeming quality is my constant anger toward the U.N.

Get these kids to do the memorial to the WTC, and all will be well again.

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Hutch is my forum daddy. And he hasn't eaten me yet.

04-12 19:15
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therapy
Registered: 06-01


Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar

Do they do this as some sort of therapeutic purpose for the kids? Is there some reason behind doing this?

I don't remember having to draw challenger pictures or anything...

Anyways, this is disturbing, but isn't it a bit too easy? I mean, picking on the art of children hardly seems difficult...

Either way, good job I guess.

G.

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04-12 19:17
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foot
Registered: 03-02


quote:
Sock came out of the closet to say:
Lets not forget the FEMA rap!

http://www.fema.gov/kids/femarap.htm



Greatest FEMA related song ever. The outro is sort of long, though.

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If rape is wrong, I don't want to be right.
Drömhus has adopted me. I had to copy and paste his name because umlauts really fuck me up.

04-12 19:17
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Mallard Duck
Registered: 07-00


Well done, Livestock.

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Movie rain is just water in a pipe.

04-12 19:20
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SpongeMaster
Registered: 01-02


quote:
therapy came out of the closet to say:
Do they do this as some sort of therapeutic purpose for the kids? Is there some reason behind doing this?


i think that's the gist of it... they want the kids to recognize and understand the event, and express oppinions/feelings on the subject. my 3rd grade class drew a big banner/mural for desert storm.

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04-12 19:22
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CBN_Shaggy
Registered: 08-01


quote:
Palpy came out of the closet to say:


This can only be the sinsister work of Walton Simons.



LOL, YES. I wholeheartedly concur.

04-12 19:27
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Vhy
Registered: 05-01


The ironic thing is that most older kids and adults would just draw something very unorigional.

When kids don't know what things are supposed to look like they draw what they feel.

04-12 19:32
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Old Grendel
Registered: 11-00

Horrible Killer of Threads

The first set is obviously Palestinian disinformation:



This is quite transparent: those are Jews in their yarmulkes and fuzzy hats, running away from the tower after setting off the explosives in anticipation of the harmless hijacked airplanes!

04-12 19:35
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Maka
Registered: 03-01

This is not a custom title. I am not special.

I love you Livestock. That was beautiful

04-12 19:42
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Saturn2K
Registered: 02-01

WOW I PRINTED OUT GOATSE.CX AT A STORE, HUH HUH HUH I'M HILARIOUS AND WITTY AND CREATIVE HUH HUH HUH DROOL

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04-12 19:49
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Teh Borg
Registered: 12-00


04-12 20:26
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AxeManiac
Registered: 11-00


Run you Beautiful Bastard you! Run!

Oh when I drew stuff like that in grade school I just got in trouble...

04-12 20:33
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an omnibus
Registered: 06-01


I'm waiting for taoc's entry.

04-12 20:43
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MrKitty
Registered: 06-01


plz post pissing pics k thx

http://www.fema.gov/kids/images/wtc19.jpg

Not showing it as an image because I'm not a bandwidth theif. Notice two things here, the cross is upside down, and it took these people 2 days to get into hell.

Edit: Some people may think I'm trying to be funny, I'm not, I'm just pointing out these two things.

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04-12 21:01
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Teh Borg
Registered: 12-00


quote:
MrKitty came out of the closet to say:
http://www.fema.gov/kids/images/wtc19.jpg

Not showing it as an image because I'm not a bandwidth theif. Notice two things here, the cross is upside down, and it took these people 2 days to get into hell.

Edit: Some people may think I'm trying to be funny, I'm not, I'm just pointing out these two things.



HEDONIST

04-12 21:29
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Oobiedoob
Registered: 11-01


That was excellent. Those Bosnian kids beat the hell out of these little pussies by a long shot.

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-April 9, 2002

04-12 21:38
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Moof Strydar
Registered: 07-01


I was afraid my stomach would cave in on itself and leak stomach acid, slowly dissolving my internal organs, it was that funny.
Excellent stuff, comrade!

04-13 07:27
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SplitSoul
Registered: 12-00

Resident Electro-Jazz Guru

Hilarious. 5.

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04-13 07:32
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Dork457
Registered: 08-01


Image enhancement time!



Just how smart are these kids???

04-13 07:43
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Captain Corny
Registered: 12-00

Forum Veteran

Beautiful as usual. You are an inspiration to us all. And if you ever decide to pursue your dream of becoming a pro wrestler, I know my money's on Microsoft. Because they produce superior software. And that ain't no lie either. A 5 for this thread. Beautiful.

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04-13 08:02
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Somebody
Registered: 01-01

I'm going to jail.

Beautiful and hilarious in a positive way! I love you, Livestock.

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04-13 08:07
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The Leck
Registered: 02-01

Will choke to death for food.

quote:
Saturn2K came out of the closet to say:
[img-http://home.adelphia.net/~themains/images/wtc2-rampage.jpg]


YES!! RAMPAGE! Where is Lizzie the Lizard though? Also, that Nazi one is hilarious in a really disturbing way.

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aim: LeckerKase

04-13 08:15
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McCritical
Registered: 03-02


OMG FEMA using kids to obscure the FACT that they had already constructed an alternate twin towers underground for just such an occasion.

MAKE THE CHILDREN WEAR TINFOIL HATS! MAKE THEM!!

04-13 08:31
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